Wednesday, April 1, 2020

Boston Celtics broadcaster, The White Mamba, remains well-loved in Bean Town.

Why the Hell am I writing about former Boston Celtics forward, Brian Scalabrine? I need to get this out of the way right from the start! I fully admit this is an unabashed attempt to get The White Mamba on our The Celtics Center podcast. Whew – that felt good – honesty first.

But Boston Celtics fans really do love Brian. So does Danny Ainge. No, Trader Danny didn’t work a deal for him. He signed him as a free agent in 2005 for FIVE YEARS – yes, five whole years at $15 million. Scal best seasons were behind him, having averaged 6.3 PPG and 4.5 RPG during the 2004-05 season with the Nets. Despite five less-than-star-quality seasons with Boston, The White Mamba became a true fan favorite.

Scal hails from Enumclaw, Washington. I had to check Wikipedia to determine if there is such a place. One has to check this stuff when the name of a town sounds like the disease you would never wish on even an enemy. Yes, it exists – but no mention of Enumclaw’s favorite son, Brian Scalabrine in the town’s website.

According to Wikipedia, Enimclaw means “place of evil spirits”, which I take to mean home-made alcohol containing too much methyl and not enough ethyl (from Dr. Scattergood’s organic chemistry class). When Scalabrine decided to forgo pro ball in favor of broadcasting, he did an “I’m Coming Home” piece parodying Lebron James epic return to Cleveland. Here is an excerpt:

Remember when I spurned the Celtics and signed with the Chicago Bulls in 2010? Actually I begged Ainge to keep me and he wished me the best of luck. I was thinking, “This is really tough.” I could feel it. I left something I had spent five years creating. I haven’t paid for a meal since 2008.

Let’s get serious. We love Scal. I had the pleasure of a private interview with him last summer and loved his analysis of the Jay Team, Jaylen Brown and Jayson Tatum, a portion of which appears below. We would like an update from Brian on the Jay Team.

Scalabrine: “It’ll be determined on Championships. Jayson can be Kevin Durant-ish. Jaylen can be – gosh – I hate using Michael Jordan, because I don’t think he can be Michael Jordan -but the way he plays, and moves – and see how he jumps in the air – ever remember when Jordan would jump and and elevate, kind of float, keep the ball high in the air. Jaylen does that a lot. I hate doing that (Jordan comparison) – Jordan – best player ever – he (Jaylen) can be more of his version of Jordan – more catch-and-shoot – he has that defensive mentality – watch the way they both get in that defensive stance – both those guys (Jay-Team) have a tremendous upside – tremendous – more than anything, it’s how hard they work – their mentality – at a young age I look at body and mentality – athleticism – both of those guys have a great head on their shoulders – not good, it’s great – (now on Jayson’s ceiling) – I always think MVP is always going to be an individual award – but I look at it like First Team All-NBA – if you’re in that category, you’re really doing something – I can see him flirting with that – I can see him like a Third-Team All-NBA this year – they have blown me away as far as how good they are – and their maturity.”

So Scal, join us at The Celtics Center. We can be as self-deprecating as you – maybe more so. I am a poor figure of an old man of 75 years still in the first stages of my fourth career as a sports writer. Justin Trombino is a writer for @_Celtics_Center, and you took the time to take a photo with the poor, lost soul. And I did you a favor when you and the BIG3 came to TD Garden last summer. My daughter, Lisa, was with me, and she has been a notorious Celtics Stalker from the days of Larry Bird and Danny Ainge (see accompanying photos). I kept her away – although she did lead a cheering section yelling out “Scalabrine, Scalabrine”.

Scal and Justin Trombino
Photo of author – will buy dinner for the guy “that hasn’t paid for a meal since 2008”
My daughter Lisa, bugging one of the BIG3 – guess who it is – Bueller?
Clyde “The Glyde” Drexler – couldn’t hide from”The Celtics Stalker”

So, Scal, can you do us a favor and do a brief gig on our podcast. Contact Tom Lane at @CelticsSentinel or The Celtics Center at @_Celtics_Center. Boston and The Celtics Center love The White Mamba.

Follow Tom at @CelticsSentinel and @_Celtics_Center

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